Who Buys the Wedding Bands?
For most soon-to-be married couples, the tradition of who pays for the engagement ring is pretty clear-cut. Historically, the man or proposer selects and pays for the engagement ring. But what about wedding bands? Does the groom choose and pay for those, too? The best answer is that it depends on what you and your spouse decide. Here’s some more information to help you navigate the process.
In centuries past, the tradition was for the bride or her family to pay for the man’s wedding ring, and the groom or his family to pay for the bride’s. That was an especially prevalent way of doing things before engagement rings—which were, of course, selected and purchased by the man for the woman. However, these days, it’s not so cut-and-dry. More often, the rings are the responsibility of the couple as a unit and not their families.
Paying for the Bands Together or Individually
Usually, the bride and groom pay for their own bands together as a couple. If you keep your finances separate and plan to do so when you get married, you might consider creating a joint wedding savings account or pot from which you can pull for all wedding-related costs, including your rings.
Who Picks Out the Wedding Bands?
As for who picks out the wedding bands, that’s up to you and your future spouse as well. Most couples today go to their jeweler together and pick out their rings as a couple, with the individual ultimately having final say. In other words, it’s not as common for the groom to pick out the wedding band for the bride or vice versa. Most people select the wedding band they personally want.
Alternatively, there’s nothing wrong with picking out and paying for your own wedding band yourself. There are many scenarios where this might make the most sense. Ultimately, it comes down to what your rings symbolize to you. If they symbolize eternity and commitment, it may not matter who pays. If they serve as a symbol of joining families or becoming one, paying for the pair together may be a better fit. Simply put: there is no right or wrong way to do it.
Talk Openly with Your Future Spouse
Figuring out who pays for what during the wedding planning process can be tricky, but most decisions can be sorted out by having an open, frank conversation with your partner. This goes for everything—from the price of the dress and suit to the cost of the rings, which are often a huge financial investment for many couples.
The best thing to do when deciding how to pay for any of these things is to create a wedding budget and discuss with your partner how you’d like to handle things. Remember, the wedding bands aren’t like the engagement ring—traditionally, they should come out of the total wedding budget rather than be separated into their own pile.
While many couples opt to spend thousands on wedding bands, there are plenty of alternative routes you can take to keep costs low and to remove some of the confusion from the who-pays-for-what conversation. Today, many brides and grooms opt for more affordable silicone wedding bands to remove some of the financial stress from the situation. You may also choose to wear these until you can afford to buy the one you really want.
Setting Your Own Rules
At the end of the day, there’s no right answer to the question of who pays for wedding bands. It all depends on your unique situation and what you and your spouse decide. Whether you pay for each other’s, pay for your own or join finances to cover the costs as a pair, as long as your rings honor your union, you’re doing it exactly right!